R is for River
I can feel at peace near a river, no matter how iced over or wild the current. I can see the same turmoil the same reckless abandon in my own heart and I understand myself a little better. I’ve always loved the water, it is so calm and cool, even in the heart of summer and river a stream or a pool cools you down. Maybe it’s because I swam competitively for a few years that water brings me back to a place of mindlessness, I can stare at a current of gently flowing water and feel and think nothing, it clears my head like nothing else on this earth. Rivers are my place of respite, the one place where I don’t think, where I don’t worry, where I barely need to breathe.
G is for Gym
I need to be here but I hate it. I have no control over myself, I barely get a say in whether I get out of bed in the morning. I need to push myself but my body doesn’t care, it doesn’t listen nor respond. My willpower is so weak I can’t even do it after seeing myself slip so far, I can barely push myself to run a second longer. How am I supposed to get any better when I can hardly start, when I can barely change into athletic clothes. My body fought me the whole way here and it’ll fight me every future step, but if not now then when – I’ve used that excuse enough. I need to do this, and I need to force myself.
B is for Bed
Oh why bed must I leave you, why must I surrender your warm embrace and refuse your soft rest. Just 5 more minutes was my excuse an hour ago, I really can’t stay but every time I lift your soft blankets your rap me up again in your comfort. I have work to do, people to see, and things to eat, but I won’t leave you just yet, five more minutes might have been an hour ago but whats another three, four hours I’ll just end up back here again later anyway, why ever leave.